We Are Infallible: Predictions and Advice for 2015

Forgive us if we don’t wax nostalgic, but auld lang syne never resonated with our predilection to look ahead.  Looking back is un-American, we believe, so we’ll let the weepy old world take a cup o' kindness while we get a leg up on the new year.

Here are 10 things, in no order of particular importance, to expect in 2015:

• Stocks will have a subpar year as corporate profit growth gives way to wage growth.  Our stock of the year is unloved Elizabeth Arden (RDEN).  You can read about it here and here.
  
  
• Wait until mid-year to buy Treasury bonds, after the Fed raises the Fed Fund rate target and coupons adjust upward on new debt.  Inflation will be nowhere in sight.
  
  
• Oil prices will stabilize as producers halt uneconomic drilling.  Big oil stocks with plump dividends look cheap.
  
  
• The Republican Senate will fail to pass any bill to repeal Obamacare as it comes to the realization that healthcare insurance is already baked into the welfare state cake, on its way to becoming a new “third rail.”
  
  
• Chris Christie will look increasingly ridiculous as Jeb Bush becomes the preferred nominee of adult Republicans.
  
  
• Elizabeth Warren will make Hillary Clinton look like a Republican, setting her up for failure against the real thing in 2016 (see above).
  
  
• The Seattle Seahawks will keep cheating and keep winning.  They will line up offside and manhandle receivers all the way to a repeat Super Bowl championship on Feb. 1.
  
  
• Jeff Samardzija will prove a better acquisition for the South Side White Sox than Jon Lester for the North Side Cubs.
  
  
• Oregon will beat Ohio State in the NCAA football championship after Marcus Mariota takes the randy Florida State scholars to school and the Buckeyes’ third-string QB exposes Alabama’s faux SEC swagger.
  
  
• The University of Oklahoma, led by Bahamian point guard Buddy Hield, will win the NCAA men’s basketball championship.
  

There you have them, our fearless calls ex cathedra.  Merry Christmas and happy New Year, gentle reader.  We’re off to the driving range as soon as the UPS guy shows up.